I have been sick off and on for a good six months. I have gone to the Doctor to be better for a week or two and then back to same ol thing. I have taken 2 or 3 different kinds of antibiotics, dizziness pills and steroids.
Nothing seems to beat this. I have been reading in Mark about healing. That I can be healed if I have enough faith. Apparently I don't have enough. I am still sick. I am on the sick spiral again. I have been in bed the last couple of days more than I have been out. I get so tired I just can't stay up anymore.
No I don't want sympathy, I would like a lesson. I would like someone to tell me what I am doing wrong. Clean living? Done. No swearing? Done ( I don't talk to many people all day) Pure thoughts? most of the time. I am reading my bible and praying every day. I just feel like I am missing it! What the it is ?? I don't know. So now what?
I post this and so many people will tell me that I have nothing to worry about. Its not that big a deal. Falling on my face because I have no balance is a big thing to me. I am terrified of getting seriously hurt. My hearing is getting worse and worse. It wasn't all that great to begin with but now Mostly gone on one side the other is failing too.
I am trying to be an upbeat person. I like smiling and being happy. I don't like being sick and snapping at people. I don't need the negative attitude in my life. I want to be positive and happy. I love my life. Every single day I find joy in it. The sickness makes it hard to enjoy it.
Any ideas??
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